Wednesday, 21 November 2012

Moving on...

Well it's been over a week now since I saw the psych, and things have started to settle down once more.

Nothing serious has been discussed with Mrs T so far, but she has seen the official letter copy to my GP, so she can be in no doubt that we are, where we are. The doc referred to me as 'Christina' in the letter, and it made me feel all goose-pimply. I'd long decided that my 'official' name would always be 'Christina', but known as Tina for short. Seeing it in writing referring to Me was, well, wonderful!

I've had some good advice over the last few days and a lot of time to reflect. I do strongly feel that I have entered a new phase of my life. I feel empowered. I'll have to be careful though otherwise I'll burst!

I've come to terms with how I feel at this time, and am even more comfortable with my inner self. The feeling of wanting to tell everyone I know is getting stronger my the day, but I have to hold on as it would likely upset the situation at home.

My son is very supportive and I've now dressed fully for 3 days running. He doesn't hide and talks to me if I'm just normal. It is amazing!

The desire to be me is very strong as well. I went out with eye liner on the other day. My daughter noticed (sort of, she thought I had mascara on...), but I don't really care. I suspect I might just add bits here and there and see how it goes. It is inevitable that I will out myself at some point. Feeling so calm and natural being just me is so, so good. I want to feel this way permanently. 24/7.

Had a bit of retail therapy as well - new forms came today, and they are lovely, but a little larger than I was expecting. They fit perfectly in my normal bra, so they are the right size for my frame. (sorry - had to add this, they jiggle nicely as well...Blush). Had a good time round the shops on Sunday, and I know I'll be getting an Epilator for Christmas as Mrs T asked me to pick the one I wanted and put it in the basket. Can't wait to get my hands on that and seriously declare war on hair. Last evening, I went to M&S on my own (in bloke mode) and bought a nice knitted top, some ankle socks, and had a really good look around. First time I've really felt totally confident even to do that in bloke mode. Times they are a changing!

Sorry for this short ramble, I just had to share my wonderfully fulfilling and feminine thoughts.

Christina. (Tina to her friends...)


  1. Outing myself has become one of the most rewarding parts of this process. The feeling of being free of this secret at last is so empowering!

    I hope it will be for you when the time comes


  2. Just recently found your blog - it's very nice to meet you! Now I have some catch-up reading to do... Hang in there, things will be getting better for you.